It’s just been such a horrible day. Kilo’s absense is so notable. There is a cougar likely hanging around that killed our neighbours mini horse last night (confirmed by conservation; not a bear. Probably a desperate young or old/weak cougar as it didn’t manage to get him over the fence). I don’t even want to be outside now not knowing if it’s nearby. We live so close and we’re surrounded by forest. Kilo always had my back. I never worried about running into wild animals he would always be so alert.

I had barely walked in the house from dropping Kilo off to be cremated when we discovered an animal had flipped our fire pit thing over. We haven’t used it all year so whatever bear or large animal that did that must have been desperate. I went over to investigate and brought Lola but she doesn’t get it. Kilo would have been sniffing all around, catching the scent of whatever had been through. Lola was just worried about her ball. I know I shouldn’t compare the two. They are so similar yet so totally different. I could always tell if something had recently passed through with how Kilo would react to new scents.

Lola is still new here though and it’s not really her home. It’s just so hard. I keep expecting to hear him bark, or hear his feet against the floor getting up whenever I get up. It’s just so quiet now.